These principles, discussed before or after first sex, are crucial to inculcate into all women you intend to have sex with because it tells them what they want to hear, that their life will become better and better by being the best lover possible for you.
You must be perfectly comfortable in your own skin talking about these subjects, without the slightest “leakage” of doubt. The notion is that if you are comfortable talking about a subject, then the woman will be, too, no matter how she might have felt about the subject in your absence. Anal sex? Videotaping her as you cum on her face? If you make it sound perfectly sexy and fun, and a naughty secret you share, then she will adopt your comfort level as her own. On the other hand, if she detects that you are even a little freaked out about the subject matter, even if it is something as innocent and uncontroversial as hand holding, she will resist and be freaked out by the subject. These principles will help her become happy, even if they are a new way of thinking to her, so long as she sees that you are comfortable with them … and so will she.
Although this may be a little out of sequence I offer them here for their ubiquitousand essential utility. Don’t leave home without them!
Principle 1: “To get good sex you must give good sex. Become an expert at giving great sex and you will experience in return the kind of sex life your friends can only fantasize about.”
This establishes that she can expect great things from and with you, and does her the great service of telling her that she is allowed and expected to become adventurous and skilled in sex, and that this is a formula for her to hold on to you. She will also see this as a path to increasing her value overall, which may serve her when she is with you and for that possible period after you have left.
Principle 2: “While it is the privilege of men to love, savor, appreciate and embrace the taste of a woman’s pussy, so is it the woman’s great privilege to learn to savor and appreciate the taste of a mouthful of cum.”
Many women will say that they “don’t give head,” where the real reason is that they are afraid of allowing you to see that they are inexperienced, and that they might humiliate themselves by doing a poor job. Explaining this as a natural right of beautiful, sexual women, you set the stage for them to learn how much fun it is for them to suck your cock.
Although I have written on this subject elsewhere, let me add here that I usually mention large numbers of blowjobs, where they can learn and refine their cocksucking skill, so they can relax and know it will not be an infrequent experience but a regular event in their lives. I also adopt the tone that when they blow me, and when I comedown the back of their throats, that I am doing this for their benefit—which so far has always been adopted as their experience with me.
Principle 3: “Good sex involves frequency and timing. Men have priority as to timing, and women have priority as to duration. That is, since men take some period of recharging between orgasms, the man is pleasured first and according to his desires so that he may be physically recovering for a second orgasm while the woman has her turn. After the man has cum then the woman enjoys hours, or as much as she wants, of slow, languid, intensive attention. When the man’s recharge period has run and he is ready again, the cycle repeats itself as he takes priority, then transition priority back to the woman, and so forth for as much time as is available.”
Simultaneous orgasm is one goal young women fantasize about achieving, but it is harder than it sounds and comes at a great cost. In the beginning, you should encourage the alternative view of maximizing each other’s individual pleasure at independent moments and save the simultaneous cum for when you both really know each other’s responses.
Then you need to discuss a fundamental difference between men and women, that men have an orgasm and usually require a “refractory” period where we recover and “reload.” For an older guy this can be a couple of hours, in some cases, much longer. What this suggests is that for the man to experience the greatest sex he should be allowed to cum 2 or 3 or 4 times in the day, and to achieve this he must get started early—have an orgasm—wait a couple of hours—have another—and so forth, until he runs out of time.
Therefore, the man cums first.
Women can have many, many orgasms throughout the day with a much shorter refractory period. If the man has cum first and then it is “their turn,” she will have a couple of hours at the minimum to enjoy a full-body pleasuring at the hands of the man.
While this may sound a little mechanical, it works out great in practice so long as the woman adopts this philosophy as her own. In practice it may work like this:
9:00am Woman blows man, man cums after :20 minutes
9:30am to noon Man pleasures woman with massage, eating pussy, and fucking as she cums three times
Noon Woman massages man, gives hand job then fucks him until he cums for a second time
1:30pm to 5:00pm Man repeats woman’s favorites, 69ing with her (where she is the privileged cummer), and fucks her as she cums 4 more times
5:00 pm to 7:00pm Break for dinner and a movie
7:30pm In cab on way home from movie, woman gives man a hand job then sucks on him as he cums … because although this was a little inconvenient, she believed that this was the optimum time for him to cum and so created the opportunity for them both. Trust me, this can be a very good thing for you both.
Principle 4: “Good sex is about learning and trying new things, and expanding your sexual envelope. Your mantra must be that you will try everything if to do so is to enhance your and your partner’s pleasure.”
This is a variation on the first principle.
Principle 5: “My goal is to discover exactly what turns you on the most, what makes you hottest, and craziest, and gets you up for the longest, most intense experience, and the most frequent orgasm at the highest intensity that lasts for the greatest duration; that makes your body feel like it is exploding with the power of the sun. And once I discover what that is— and the cool thing is that you probably don’t know exactly what that is at this time, that that experience is buried deep in your DNA and it is our privilege to dig it out and discover it together. And then once I discover what it is that makes you hottest, that you enjoy the most, the gives you the greatest most unimaginable pleasure ever— no matter how weird or strange or common or perverted—I’m going to do nothing else for you but that over and over and over and over, 20 or 50 or a hundred times, and I’ll only stop when I discover something new, something that you like even better, and then I’ll switch to that. Because you’re that important to me, and because you’re lucky enough to have met me.”
I explain this to women as a matter of fact, and it has never failed to elicit a happy smile. When I point out that what turns them on is something that I don’t at the moment, and neither do they, but that we will find out together—I am explaining that even if in their deepest dreams and desires, they have something really immoral and kinky they want to do but feel it is too dirty or too uncomfortable to reveal to me, then when I discover this (and they are not “responsible” because I am the one who discovered it, without much of their help) I will keep doing it until I find something they like that is better.
Principle 6: “Men can cum a few ways, some very pleasurable, kinky, fun, perverted, and emotionally bonding, and all are worth the effort. But women can cum dozens of different ways and combinations of ways, in so many different parts of their bodies and in some cases, all at once, with so many different intensities that it must surely be a great privilege to be a woman. So my pledge to you will be for so long as we are together, to constantly strive to make your sexual experience better than you thought possible, and the envy of every woman you know now or shall ever meet in the future.”
Read David Shade.
Principle 7: “Good sex is absolutely required for good health. The man and the woman that have an intense, exciting, varied, and kinky sex life are mentally sharper and happier; they enjoy their work more and achieve better results; their bodies remain healthier both from the sex itself and from the general feeling of well being, which allows exercise and good eating and other factors to keep the body fit. Women especially are vulnerable to depression without great sex in their lives, and the experience supplants any need for Prozac-type drugs. And when difficulty in life strikes, the memory of recent, overwhelming, intensely pleasurable sex can be the difference between responding to the difficulty constructively or collapsing under the stress. Repeat after me: Good sex is absolutely required for good health. It is a duty we owe to one another.”
Principle 8: “Good sex is the glue that binds two people together. Love is ephemeral: if you want to stay together, have good sex regularly. If you don’t care about the relationship and you want it to come apart, ignore the other partner’s health and sexual needs and the relationship with wither.”
This states a truism. There cannot be love long term, without sex. If they want to keep you, then sex is part of the bargain. If the sex goes away, then the love ends and so does the relationship.
Women are propagandized that this is not the case, that love is eternal even if and when they decide to give up on sex. Coincidentally, and quite conveniently, our culture has taught them that even if the sex dies, that the man retains an absolute duty of taking care of them. That this is a one-way bargain and patently unfair and unacceptable to men is an element never taught to them.
We correct this misapprehension early on so that the sex, and the love, stays forever … or as long as you desire it to.
Principle 9: “Good sex is so important that it is not always possible or desired to wait until the “mood” strikes you. If the opportunity for good sex arises (bearing in mind the priorities of Principle 3, supra), start! Become a performance artist for the one you love! Your interest will catch up shortly and you’ll honor the other principles above with greater fidelity than waiting around for the “mood” that may decide to never reappear.”
This is another myth to be busted, that sex should occur when both parties feel like it. If this were the case there would be very little sex. Your job is to note when she seems sexually interested and then offer her great sex; and her job is the same, in reverse. While this may seem obvious to the man it must be explained to the woman, and again, early on.
Follow all of these guidelines and you are mostly the way home to a good sexual relationship.