The other night, I was asked for advice by a coach from different company. We’d met up at one of my local clubs on a late Friday evening. He’d been eying the girls and surmising an approach.
He said: “Quick, Sin. Give me an opener.”
“Opener ?” I replied.
“Yeah. Give me something to say.”
It was clear he wanted a quick opening line or preset story to open the HB leaning against the wall and facing our direction.
“Just use a situational,” I continued.
“Huh ?” he replied.
“You know, just make an observation about her. Something she’s wearing. Something she’s doing. You know, anything.”
Obviously, he didn’t look happy at what I had told him.
“You mean, you don’t have a line or opener already prepared ?”
I shrugged. “Why ?” I asked. I motioned at all the women in the club with my hand. “I already have thousands of openers waiting for me. Out there,” I added.
“So you’re saying you don’t open with anything except what you notice in the moment ?”
I nodded yes.
He noticeably looked perplexed, if not a bit confused.
“It’s easy,” I said, and then grabbed the first HB walking by to demonstrate. “Love the dress,” I quickly said, reaching out and touching the lacy bottom half. I examined it as she watched me ? as if everything I did was completely normal. “Wow. This thing is see-through. Nice !” She smiled. “Oh my god, are your stockings …?”
“Rubber,” she said with a nod.
I smiled back. “I have to touch.” And I did. “Oh, you should have never let me do that ! Rubber stockings. I like.” (Mind you, I didn’t add that lace and rubber stockings were a bit weird, even for me.)
I stood back up to include my friend / wing now. “See,” I said. “That easy.”
The HB waited idly as he nodded with an even more deeply perplexed look on his face. She smiled and started to explain where she’d found her stockings when I pulled us away.
“You mean you never use lines or routines ?”
“No,” I said shaking my head. “After years of this stuff, I’m way too lazy now. Besides, you only need to use situationals. And the more you use them, the better you get. You should use the Multiple Hits Routine and just practice making observations as you pass by without commitment. When you get really good and glib, you can transition into a real story or event when she offers up the topic unsuspectingly. Just use social intelligence to speak on the subject offered. Then tease her sexually, use kino, you know … attract her while you’re doing it. It’s that simple. Plus, you come off as not trying to pick her up, since you’re talking about subjects that come up naturally.”
My friend shook his head as he considered his options. He walked away and opened the HB leaning against the wall with a situational. What he said to her, I don’t know. I found myself in another situation that bumped into me from behind, and I became preoccupied with that one.
Who says situational openers don’t work ? They’re all I use ! The key is to be natural, and to be able to extract the next lead so you don’t end up dangling there without something else to say. This is the most natural form of conversation between strangers. You can be more “direct” and make it more obvious that you are interested in her by using kino and showing your interest and desire. Or more “indirect” where you seem curious and talkative, but your motives are unclear to her (but be wary of the friend zone.)
Then, to build attraction you must “tease” her ! Think grade school taunting ? but in a fun way. You should make it sexual, too. Sometimes, you may even be a little mean, but (as opposed to pushing only) make sure you soften the tease by admitting that you’re being bad. “I’m so bad tonight. But bad is good, right ? Wait. Are you telling me you’re a good girl ? Or a bad girl ? Hmm ?” Then tease more and find out. Then pull her to you (for some reason, the number one thing I see inPUAs is they never pull. Push, push, push, she leaves, and somehow they feel good about this, like by pushing her away saves them the rejection of a failed pull.)
You can also be very passionate / exciting to talk to, using fun stories that demonstrate value or show off your intelligence, using kino to express yourself while you talk, etc. Basically, you’re animated and attractive. Of course these lead to other techniques, but usually, you’ll naturally pick one or the other to try to interest her. Then it’s up to you to carry on the conversation and close.
Another example of a situational opener was done at one of the VH-1 parties a few weeks ago. I was standing on the patio in front of the sliding glass door with Vapor when a HB9 walked through.
I pointed at her water bottle without even thinking.
“That stuff will kill you, you know.”
She held up the bottle and looked at the water inside.
“Powerful stuff,” I added (touching the bottle in her hand.)
“Oh yeah, straight vodka,” she said.
“Damn girl ! (pushing / pulling her hip) I’ll bet you can drink old Russian men under the table, huh ?”
She laughed and nodded. “Oh yeah,” she said, “all the time.”
So notice here she gave me my “story topic.” Everything after this was true to me.
“You know what’s funny ? Expensive vodka gives me terrible headaches, but the cheap stuff in plastic bottles doesn’t at all. I wake up the next day early and ready to work.”
The conversation went on from there.
Of course, I could have made up a vodka story routine and had it prepared (waiting for some obscure moment to use it.) Or I could have asked her for her opinion about whether she preferred expensive vodka or cheap vodka. Etc. But then, I’d have to have a crap load of stories saved in my head for every possible situation (if it was going to engage the true situation, that is.) Wouldn’t I ?
So I ask you: is the art of pick up about being in the moment ? Or about a script ? The big question is: why have situational openers seemingly been lost ?
Or have they ?