Navigating the minefield of friends and logistics.

Mr. Montreal Madison: Last week a friend and I were downtown catching the subway. I spotted a cute girl on her cell texting. I chat her up about how I am surprised she has reception. I was in an awesome fun vibe and didn’t really care if it went anywhere, I was just being the world’s happiest man, and spending my light. Shine on.The subway comes and it’s a really short conversation … maybe only 5 minuets before our stop. I chat her up about being a teacher, how I used to skip school to go to the library, and how I had problems with teachers who got burnt out. Come to think of it, I shared a lot of my views.

Just then the subway doors open, and I jump out and literally yell my first name at her and my last initial and tell her to add me on Facebook. Doors close. 2 days later, to my surprise, she adds me. This is something I was talking with a friend about recently: giving your number or Facebook out to a woman and not taking hers. You get less stress, and only girls who are truly interested contact you back. It also helps you to really perfect the first impression you make on people, and it changes the dynamic of the relationship. She automatic becomes the “seller.” I’ve been working on a theory lately. The theory is that the cold approach is the 4th most important thing to get the girl. #1 is the Dynamic, #2 is the Situation, #3 is the Impression, and #4 is the actual “pick up.” If you control the dynamic and situation, even if your cold approach is not very good, she will still be reacting, chasing you, and maintaining attraction for a much longer time. The actual pickup is not that important. Think about it … Anyways, back to our little romance tale. We talk about dreams and hopes on Facebook, no more than 5 messages back and forth. I give her my cell.

I get a text late Tuesday night saying that she is going out … I’m so lazy, I’m like argh, I don’t wanna move or go anywhere. It’s like 11:30pm. I start screening logistics over text and she tells me that she is sleeping at a friend’s house tonight. She has 6 friends with her now + they are not sleeping over = good times for the win. I ask her if I can convince her to make a detour before sleeping over at her friend’s house. She asks, “How will I convince her ?” I don’t even bother to reply, it’s game on. I get in a taxi and head out to meet my friends and the girl.   1 AM Get there, text, find her. Spin hug, meet the friends. I have been sucking pretty badly lately. The last 4 girls I pulled I did not sleep with, and never saw them again. Fail. Problem was I was not keeping my challenging frame all the way to the end. My focus tonight was to be a challenge and build 2 hours of pure comfort before sex. So I tell her she is cheep cause she loves the dollar cinema. I get up and pretend to leave, saying it’s not gonna work out between us. I tease her about her favorite movie being The Wizard of Oz, etc. Then I isolate and pull her to the bar, we talk … holding, no kissing.

2 AM Pull to dance floor, dance close, a few spins, no grinding. Lots of swaying back and forth so she falls into my rhythm physically and emotionally. I’m trying to take her into my world. Eskimo kiss, forehead kiss. I don’t go for the lip kiss. I try to pull, but her friends are leaving and she has to talk to them. I lost a girl last week by hovering over her too hard for 10 minutes when she was talking to her friends. So this time I stay like 10 feet away and do my own thing. I check in every 4 minutes.

I tell my buddy towing the friends and try to bounce them all to our terrace for an after party. No dice. Friends leave. Back to the corner, I swaddle my girl and rock her back and forth as we dance to the music. Kinda like how a mother rocks a baby to sleep. We’re just swinging and swaying, forehead to forehead. No kissing.   A friend says his roommate’s dad is out of town and I could use the dad’s bed. I ask her if she is ready to go, she’s like “yeah.” So my friend runs ahead and leaves the door open. We are walking down the street and her sandal breaks. I give her a piggy back ride. At the house on the terrace I push her up against the wall … first kiss.

Taking my time to make out. Lots more getting to know each other. 30 minutes pass and we go inside the bedroom. I ask my buddy for advice, he reminds me to sit on the bed and just talk and then kiss, talk, and kiss some more. Not to be in a hurry to get her panties off. I’m looking for a FB, and for that I can’t risk any buyers remorse. 20 minutes more of this. Panties com off by themselves, no LMR.

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