Alexander’s 5 Golden Rules for having threesomes (over and over).

I have had repeated requests for this, so here it is.Below are rules I worked out for myself, which I use every time I have a threesome with a new woman. Keep in mind that this stuff might be more useful for the “advanced” people out there, and should be used with care by the beginners.

Rule #1: Set Things Up Right From The Very Beginning

The three magic words here are: Honest.Direct.Respectful

Let’s dissect them one by one.

Honest

At the very first meeting with a new girl, whether I meet her in a club or at some social gathering, I let her know exactly who I am and what my lifestyle is. I used to be too straightforward about it when I started, but I learned to calibrate based on the social setting and the woman’s state and mood.

Here’s an important realization: even women who might normally be open-minded will indignantly reject you if you bring up the subject too directly, or in an environment where she feels others may judge her for talking about such an “indecent” subject. Even if she’s interested in you, she will reject this opportunity if there is even the slightest chance that her close friends / colleagues / family might overhear a single word of our conversation.

This also depends on her friends and colleagues, of course. But it is safer to assume conservative surroundings, and then just drop a hint or two and suggest getting together another time. In the vast majority of cases, she will be happy to meet a guy who is so socially intuitive.

Direct

Once we get together, I do my best to make sure that we both enjoy our conversation: that it’s light, fun, and interesting. I honestly tell her about the other women in my life. Often, I do it indirectly, just by telling stories about my other girlfriends, but not directly addressing the sexual nature of my relationships.

Why ? Because women are very socially intuitive. They understand anyway.

This is a question of calibrating. Some women do not want to hear about your sexual side. They want to be led into an adventure. Things should “happen” to them, so they can later say, “Oh, all this started as an accident.” Others like to hear details and ask questions.

Either way, I am totally honest and open. It took me a couple of years of trial and error to get intuitive about the whole process.

During our conversation, I find out if she has any bisexual experiences. The vast majority of women are in fact bisexual. Frequently, girls want to try, but have just never had the chance. So if at this point I still like her and enjoy her company, I suggest that she meet my other girlfriends some day … on one condition. That she really wants to. I put no pressure on her whatsoever.

Years ago, I used to get very excited about the possibility of having two women in bed, and tried to convince them. The more effort I made, the less interested they became. I made this mistake for years until I learned that it is useless.

Respectful

During the course of our conversation (fun, light, and pleasant) I clearly let her understand that I respect her and the choices she makes. Whatever she decides, I am cool with that. There are plenty of fun things the two of us can do without any other women being involved.

Amusingly enough (and I would not have believed this if someone had told me years ago), some women stay with me in a relationship knowing that I have other women. Their conscious choice is to keep seeing me without meeting my other girlfriends. I respect this.

I know that when the difference in beliefs and values between two people is too great, there is no sense in trying to keep her, or trying to convince her of anything.

Rule #2: The New Woman Is Not Going To Be The Center Of Attention

This part is not so easy for men to manage. When I see, hear, and feel this hot, exciting new girl next to me, my intuitive urge is to give her the biggest share of my attention.This is a huge mistake.

My other girlfriend will feel neglected, and this will deeply hurt her feelings. This is why I divide my attention 95-5 during our first threesome. That means I give 95% of my attention to my main girl, and only 5% to the new one.

It may sound illogical and strange for many men. However, this rule (and the discipline needed to apply it) have resulted in more threesomes than I can remember. The new girl will receive more than enough attention from my other girl. And more often than not, my other girl will see my devotion and attention to her, and will explicitly ask me to pay more attention to the new girl.

I do so with pleasure (as you can probably imagine), but after a couple of minutes, I usually come back to my girlfriend. Do this, guys, and you will never have any issues afterwards.

Rule #3: Find Out What Her Idea Of A Threesome Is

Before inviting a new woman, I always ask my other girlfriends what threesome rules they would like to follow. Keep in mind that I have a very open-minded and happy circle of girlfriends, and there are almost no taboos. However, some girls want me to come in them. Others get jealous if I am kissing the other girl too much in the beginning, etc.Again … honest, direct, and respectful are the key words here.

Rule #4: Communicate During The Threesome

Before you begin, tell both girls that you are not a mind reader. So if they want more / less / harder / softer / etc., they will have to tell you (and each other).Do not think, however, that just because you have told them this they will comply. You have to watch them both and ask questions.

Here is the last part …

Rule #5:
After The Threesome Is Over, Be The Host

Now it’s time for all three of you to enjoy the afterglow, and to Set up the right frame for the future. Divide your attention equally between both girls. If you give less attention to the new girl, she will feel alienated and will not be willing to join you again. Be a host now.

Imagine you are at the restaurant the and girls are paying for you. So just lay back and shower them with your cool personality …

Enjoy trying this out !


Alex May
Alex May

Alex May is Moscow-born and Amsterdam-based sex- and relationship specialist. He stresses the importance of re-assessing people’s REAL wants, needs, and beliefs, along with making conscious choices and heart-centered decisions. In short, this can be described as “unplugging from the matrix” and finding your TRUE SELF.

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