My first Threesome.

I got into the game precisely three years ago and what a ride it’s been. Had to battle through the worstoneitis  in the history of mankind (STILL think of her to this day). Had to rewire some deep beliefs.

Had to START going to bars dead sober and in my 40’s…. I remember Doc telling me three years ago: “think twice about undertaking this journey…it’s cold out there”. There have been many, many nights of staying home and crying and feeling so devastatingly lonely.

And then there was last night!

I should mention, I have been stuck working in Vermont the last 5 weeks. Literally have not set foot in Montreal in all that time. Lonely, lonely weekends – one after another. In and out of depressions exacerbated by self-pity.

Last night I finally rallied, called some friends and went out with an FB of mine who I know is into anything.

So we were set  to meet some old old gf’s of mine from when I was a kid (thank you Facebook!) one of them was planning to introduce me to one of her friends.

So we get to this place called The Firm on the Waste Island and – depressing. Chodeville. I get introduced to their group and it is clear to see I have massive status. They clearly had been talking about me and anticipating my arrival. I immediately caveman them all – grab them, pick them up, toss them around, and walk away to dance.

I see that I have attraction from my target so I take 2 steps back. Made the mistake so many times of trying to amp up the attraction and turn them on in the club and really I only did that because in my insecurity I was looking for IOI’s to continue. Now I assume the sale. Far more important than tactics last night though, was that the tactics, etc. are SOO internalized in me now. I flirt this way with old ladies now, for crying out loud. I have BECOME THAT GUY!!

I venue change the group.

At 3 am, as we’re walking out, I lean in and make out with my target. The one who introduced us says to her “I’m going to kill you for this” and I was like “damn if you want me too here’s your chance LOL!” But inside I’m thinking “Huh? You mean you are still like this in your late 30’s?!?!? Grow up!”

As my date and the new girl are walking to our cars, I’m scanning my head for what to do. “So where’s the after party?” say I. “I hear you have a nice big house to party in” I say to the new girl.

Me: “Let’s go there”
Her: objections objections
Me: “Come on, let’s go!”

Get to her house and again I’m conscious enough to take 2 steps back. I sit in the armchair, not the couch. I let the two girls take the couch and get to know one another (we met like 3 hours ago for God’s sakes!). I barely talk. Eventually I move in between them on the couch. Nice and relaxed. Easy. Light. Fun. Kiss one, kiss the other. Stand up, take them both by the hand and move them upstairs to the bedroom and what ensued was absolutely the greatest most worthwhile culmination of my three years of pain and development as a PUA.

I now get to live in a world where this kid of shit happens FOR REAL !!!!

Most important element was the inner frame hands-down. One big change lately is a change of intention. From the beginning, I heard gurus say to just go out to have fun and be social. But last night I really had the firm intention to pick -up. I was literally prepared to ask girls flat out “What are the odds of you and I hooking up tonight?” because if the answer was “None” I would not spend a second longer in set. The other element was TWO STEPS BACK. T

his involves to ability to recognize that I am NOT merely assuming the sale, but seeing clearly that it is in fact ON and that therefore the thing to do is to ramp up attraction by pulling slightly AWAY – and having her chase. And when she came back to engage me, I knew it was time to move to rapport and comfort building and did that seamlessly with a simple “So what’s your story?” And, finally, when I got to her house, the fact that I remained calm and acted like it was normal and made everyone comfortable by BEING comfortable with myself. But all that said, you know what’s taken me forever to get? THE GIRLS WANT THIS TO HAPPEN – and all I’ve got to do is make the right moves in the right sequence and NOT F IT UP. lol!

I’ve been asked if I just said “come on let’s go” and head to my car, assuming she would lead me in hers. But I wasn’t even driving! Someone else asked when I knew it was on – it was at this moment when she agreed to have my FB and I come over. She had to know at that point that it was NOT just going to be a nightcap!

Did I get her verbal agreement or accompany her to her car? I did not – I felt it would be wrong to abandon the girl I came there with.

Did I feel there was some chance she would rethink the whole thing while she’s driving alone in her car? I didn’t question whether she would change her mind because I didn’t assume she had made up her mind. I knew it would make or break once we got there and it would depend on my actions/energy once at her place. My big question was whether I should walk in the door and caveman right away or let it happen organically.

Did I have to manage the new girl’s social circle beyond handling the catty comment from the friend? Do I think the girl was/will be judged, or does the fact that she left with a “couple” mitigate that (ie: it’s not a common hook-u scenario/plausible deniability)? The circle did not know that we left together as we all said goodbye and it was only as we were leaving towards our respective cars that I had the bright idea to suggest it. She was VERY concerned that her friends not know – made us “pinkie swear” repeatedly that it would remain secret and wrote me an email the next day echoing her need for discretion.

I missed the “elusive obvious” elements that led to my threesome.

The biggest part really, obviously, like D’UH was having a pivot who was in and willing and who’s independent energy and actions allowed me time and space and permission to seduce the new girl.

And, d’uh, that was made possible by the fact that I had established that frame with her. Now, this was less “tactical” than I can take credit for. Reality is I picked her up, had a lot of hot sex for a while and then I LJBF’d her. Then we became friends – this had her chasing – she is the girl who organized my b-day party this year for God’s sakes – I mean, she went way out of her way. Real sweetie. And here I am taking it all for granted. Tsk-tsk. When she asked me what I wanted for my b-day, what do youPUA’s all reckon I answered?! THREESOME.

(She even said to me on the way home “Happy birthday”…..She forgot to add “Mr.President” but I let it slide that time 😉

Final D’uh – she was in my life at all because I went out and classic PU’d her at fucking Cavalli’s (very nearly coulda, woulda shoulda bathroom pulled her). Now two things: One, I’m about to give you my patented Big-G Threesome opener/ frame setter/and screener all in one, but first a back story. When I told my one-itis three years ago in full AFC form, that for my b-day I wanted a threesome….Ooof! She NEVER recovered! Felt betrayed; like she wasn’t “enough” for me. She would bring it up as her trump card in arguments three years later and presumably till the end of time. She’d be like “Yeah ?! I sucked his dick, so what ?!? You sent me the FUCKING THREESOME LETTER, YOU BAAAAASTARD!!!!!!”

Ok, the threesome opener. Good story on how I came up with it. That was the most ON night I ever had (FR in archives here somewheres). The girl I later closed on a day 2 and who was BY FAR the best girl I have had in the last three years (blew it subsequently when I went all AFC on her. But wouldn’t you know, a year later she just poked me on Facebook – Ha! She’s the ex of one of Mtl’s richest men (no exaggeration – a real legend and known ladies’ man extraordinaire) she’s looking to have that kind of lifestyle afforded her and screens for wealth. But who does she poke?)

So the opener: I walk up and I say “Hey I need your opinion – on a scale of 1 to 10, how wrong is it for a guy to ask his gf for a threesome on his b-day?”

This is an awesome opener cause like I said, you simultaneously have a juicy opinion opener, you are setting a frame immediately and you are screening for openness.

Her answer ?

“MINUS THREE!”

🙂

I LITERALLY screamed out loud “DING-DING-DING we have a WiiiiiiNAAAAHHHH!!”

I then made her steal chocolate off the table and feed it to me and then I kissed her with “ever had a chocolate kiss?”

So, newbies, I guess it’s true – it took me a lot of steps over three years to even BELIEVE that it was POSSIBLE (And I’m, for God’s sakes, the guy who hosted the damned threesome panel for Cliff’s DVD’S!!!)

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

pzn_player:

LR: Toronto trip!

This LR is not nearly as exciting as all the other crazy things we did in Toronto, but I’m posting for one purpose…I learned a lot about LMR.

Lately, my mindset, as I was telling the guys on the trip is simply 2 things:

-being in the now (through meditative work, multiple points of attention [Steve P. stuff], reading books like “The Power of Now”)

-Knowing that she really wants to fuck me, I just don’t want to give sex to her too easily (sincerely believe this guys, women have desires like you do, maybe even more, please convince yourself that this is true, because it is)

-The corollary of the previous statement is: always accuse her of what I think she’s accusing me of

All right before I go on, I’m a guy who loves the player lifestyle and all, but I don’t want to lose that spiritual, inner-game, heart-connection part of interactions with women. So I’m never going to write a post only with inner-game because I know that when you start out with this stuff, you need to hear the outer game, the juice, in order to understand what the “skeleton” of pick-up looks like.

This isn’t going to be a long post (the LR itself isn’t….my comments are hopefully going to be useful to you guys, though), as I pretty much no longer care about validation or the ego boost I get from this. The purpose of this post, like I said is to try and transfer to you guys, what I learned.
_________________

So this girl, last time I went to T.O. (a few months ago), I gamed at a house party. I actually didn’t talk to her more than 1-2 minutes that night. I got her e-mail through my cousin. We stayed in touch on MSN, very casually and what I started doing lately (something inspired from my friend Len) was to make no excuses for my desires as a man and overtly speak about sex and how comfortable I am with it. As soon as I did this, it hooked, she was responding playfully, somewhat sexually to me on MSN.

She started calling me and stuff (I obviously made her chase). The last phone conversation before I went to Toronto started turning into phone sex, but I quickly put an end to it because often phone sex has triggered ASD (anti-slut defense) for me. I told her “I’m not going to spend my time describing to you all the things I’m going to do to you when I know what you want is for me to just do them to you in the moment. I can only promise you one thing, I will take you higher than you’ve ever been before”. The whole “I will take you higher than you’ve ever been before” is one of Zan’s lines…it shows confidence and sexual skills. Even if I’m not the Steve P. of sexual techniques, it doesn’t matter. That’s beside the point. Even though I’ve learned many White-Tiger Tantra techniques, I’m not a pro…however, if I plant the idea in her head that the sex will be great, she probably won’t be able to resist it.

I told her I was coming down to T.O. She didn’t respond in an excited manner. That got me wondering…ok she’s acting like she doesn’t care? No one fucks with pzn_player…it should always be a pleasure for a girl to see me, if nothing more, it should be the most exciting day of her life.

So what I did is I send her a txt message saying “Fuck, my trip to T.O got canceled”. She msg’d back with “Why?” I never responded.

Upon my arrival in T.O, I msg her with “I’m in yo city yo”. She msgs back “Where?” I tell her “Backpackers’ hostel, but I have a big business meeting tonight.” (Business meeting = RSDseminar)…lol.

She calls me the same night acting super busy with an awful amount of background noise asking me if I’m going to come see her, I told her I don’t know the city and I’m too busy to go around the city and I’m not ditching my friends.

She txts the next day with “where are u”, I txt back with “at the hostel, Spadina/King Street”. She msgs back with “why don’t you come see me?” I don’t respond. She calls me.

She asks me to come see her. I tell her “I think we both know that what you want is to come see me, how dare you ask a guest to come see you in a new city, you’re supposed to come see me”. She’s like “But I’m at work”. I’m like “Yes but I know you want to come see me after work, stop acting like an aloof female”. She’s like “Yes, I do want to see you”. I say “I’m glad you’re mature and honest enough to speak your mind”.

She shows up at the hostel. I make her wait for 10-15 mins in the lobby. I get there, I put my hand on her neck, because I come from behind her. She gets goosebumps. She gets up, she’s all sensual.

I tell her I have to drop something off upstairs and maybe we could shisha. She says ok. We get upstairs and she offers me some pot. I refuse. I’ve only smoked once in my life to experience the buzz. Yea, it’s pretty chill the first 30 mins, but then it turns you into a useless human being.

She had brought me a mango juice (because I told her to get me something to greet me lol…). We sit on the bed. She keeps asking me to cuddle. I think to myself, this girl is not long-term material, I don’t want to fall into the cuddly-boy trap. I cuddle a little, and go for the kiss. She moves away. She says “let me make something clear, I’m not having sex with you”. I just say “I know you want to have sex with me, but even if you begged me to I wouldn’t, I’m tired”. That killed her game.

She keeps cuddling and shit. She asks me to talk about myself a bit. I realize there might be a lack of comfort. I talk and talk and talk. Eventually I go for the kiss again, I try grabbing some titties. Again, she moves my hand away, she’s like “we’re not having sex, I told you”.

If there’s one thing I did that turned the whole thing around, it was at this point.

I realized initially she was the chaser, but from the time we came to the room, I became the chaser. And, I never chase.

I said to her “You know, you keep bringing up sex, and I just felt like kissing you, but you know what, I’m not going to kiss you ever again, you don’t seem mature enough.”

COMPLETE FREEZE-OUT.

Her next line was “Why are you ignoring me?”

I said “I’m not ignoring you, I just won’t share any more kisses with you”

I just lay down, meditating. She started kissing. I told her to stop because we had an agreement not to have sex.

She kisses me more.

(Yes guys, female psychology is REALLY something.)

The more she kisses my lips, the more I resist her kisses.

I eventually give into her advances and let her kiss me.

She doesn’t like licking. She likes biting.

I let her lead to sex from this point on. She takes her top off. I undo her bra.

Oh yeah, one more thing I told her….and this one was a big one…but it may have fucked things up bad.

When she said “we’re not having sex” the 3rd time, I told her in a seductive low masculine voice, “I know you keep bringing sex up because you want me to grab you and fuck your brains out as hard as possible, but I don’t even think I have any condoms, so let’s just enjoy the moment.” Maybe the condom thing was too much but wtv, it was said in the moment.

So while I’m fingering her with Steve P. techniques, she’s like “you really don’t have a condom?”

I say “maybe it’s your lucky day, maybe I do!”

She’s like “then fucking go grab it!”

LOL.

By the way, I never came when I fucked her. David Deida suggests that in the “The Way of the Superior Man.” Cumming only depletes a man’s energy. So whenever I can, I don’t come, because after sex you still feel powerful, you don’t feel like sleeping.

Anyway, I fucked her as hard as I could and then I was completely dead. She told me she had promised her mommy to spend the evening with her. I said “well it’s still not too late.” I walked her to the cab, open the door for her, make sure she’s inside, I give her 1 kiss on the cheek, and close the door.

I go back to the hostel. What happens next is a whole other adventure.
_______________________________________

There are 2 smoking hot girls in the lobby. Like two 9s or something. One of them is a blond-blue-eyed Australian girl. Pistolero wants her, so I’m like, ok wtv, let him have her, I just fucked this other chick and I’m too fucked anyway.

I tell Pistolero, let one person do the leading, I’ll take care of it. I start telling them about shisha and they have wine, but no bottle opener (FUCK! Pistolero man, if we had a bottle opener, we woulda closed these chicks, we would have had an orgy for sure….and the bigger pissoff is we later found out Jaydee had one).

So I walk them to their room and tell them to come up to ours. They say, “Umm, we’ll come join you in 10 mins.” I felt flaky bullshit. So I said “Listen guys, can we count on you to be there in 10 mins, otherwise we’re going to join the boys for some private party.” They’re like, sure we’ll be there.

Pistolero and I go to the room. I tell him what my plan is. Light up the shisha. Put the mattress on the floor “spontaneously” when they arrive, sit next to each other, smoke shisha, hopefully drink some wine…and eventually just make out with the chicks.

They arrive, we talk for a bit. I fix the shisha.

This is where it fucked up. The mattress thing was a bad idea. Pistolero throws it on the floor and puts all the pillows on it. Fuck looking at it in retrospect, I understand why it fucked up, I’m never making this mistake again. Women are afraid of “THE BED.”

Additionally, they didn’t even have the wine. Because we had no opener. If we had drank, it would have been SO much easier. Damn!

Pistolero man, we owe ourselves a threesome soon, we’ll pull them in Montreal, I promise. We were so fucking close.

As soon as the mattress got on the floor, they’re like “we better go” etc. I’m like “let’s smoke for at least 10 mins guys”. Fuck I became AFC a bit, but the problem was the fucking mattress, damage was already done.

One of them even SAID to us “If we sit on the mattress, we probably won’t be able to get up”….fuck this meant sex. But we just escalated too fast. And we had no wine.

So they left.

___________________

I go back downstairs. There’s this chick who’s also Australian, blond 25/26 year old. I talk to her. I was giving off such a fucking sexual vibe after fucking that chick (remember, I never came when I fucked the chick).

I was so fucking tired, guys. I just tell her to follow me. I sit on the couch and start falling asleep. She doesn’t shut the fuck up. She’s gaming the shit out of me. I tell her, let’s go upstairs, I gotta show you the cutest shisha in the world.

I really think my shisha is the biggest part of my game lol.

She’s like “sure”. She wanted to get fucked.

I brought her upstairs. Make-out super fast. She’s into it.

I was so fucking TIRED, I didn’t want to escalate to sex.

So I told her let’s go back downstairs, “I’m so tired that even if you begged me for sex, I wouldn’t have sex with you”. She laughs.

Anyway, we traded numbers and she’s coming to Mtl soon, she told me she’d call me for sure.
_____________________________

There was also this lesbian chick who’s like “I’m a lesbian”

I’m like “I believe the correct term is bi-sexual” HAHAHA…anyway, I’ll write about that later.

P.S I also gotta thank my boys (Jaydee, Armada, Athan, Doni, Pistolero) for the tremendous help with logistics. They all left the room so I could spend 1-2 hours with her. That’s what I call winging!

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Gogland (a moderator of the torontolair.CA):

I’m sure we’ve heard it before… a woman has two categories of friends. Those she would never fuck, and those that are already fucking her. But just where does this come from? As guys, I believe that anytime we find a woman worthy enough to be a friend… we also want to plow into them and make them scream daddy at the top of their lungs… okay maybe the daddy part is just reserved for the perverts like me. But what I’m getting at is that we’re totally respecting the woman not just for her friendship, but also her sexuality as well, and that’s completely manly and respectable.

However, women are not the same in their judgment. They have VERY close friends, that, OH MY GOODNESS, they have no respect for their sexuality. Honestly, it’s always been something that has ANNOYED me to no end with a lot of women, and quite frankly I feel as though if a woman is unable to respect my sexuality, she is unable to respect me, thus friendship over. But I just never really got WHY they couldn’t just spread open for their friend until now.

Gogland’s Theory Number 47 (because I have no clue how many of these I will have, this one gets a random number.)

Women can only respond to men in two ways, either as a lover/father figure, or as a friend/child, and it makes perfect sense for them to do so. For the survival of the species, a human child has to be raised to a certain age before they can take care of themselves… and this is a task that takes a good many years. Naturally the one who would be saddled with this responsibility is a woman as she bears this offspring. Think of all the little motherly instincts built into a woman. I cannot think of anything more vicious than a woman defending her offspring. A woman is built in with natural mothering instincts, and it doesn’t bode well for her child’s survival if she were to think of her own child as a sexual being that could provide for her… a small babe has no ability to do any of this and needs all the protection in a cruel world to survive.

So, when a man had been given the, “Let’s Just Be Friends” line… let us examine what has just happened.

1. The woman has determined that she does not want to sleep with the man.
2. Because she does not want to sleep with him, this means that NO ONE wants to sleep with him.
3. If NO ONE wants to sleep with him, he must not have any sexuality.
4. If he has no sexuality… he’s a child.
5. And if he’s a child, and he sorta cares for me because he buys me gifts and pays attention to me… that makes him like MY CHILD!

Yes my good friend. When a woman tells you, “let’s just be friends” what she is really communicating is, “why don’t you be my little child that I can work my mothering instincts on and get tons of practice for when I raise my own child!”

BUT WAIT! You will have none of this! YOU ARE A SEXUAL BEING! YOU ARE A MAN! YOU WILL NOT BE A WOMAN’S CHILD! So you up the sexuality and go for her anyway. Just what happens here?

1. This man is my child. My child could never be sexual… he’s just a little baby!
2. Wait, my child is getting sexual with me! This doesn’t make sense! He’s my child!
3. If a child is getting sexual, that means he’s growing up!
4. If my child is growing up that means HE’S LEAVING ME!
5. ICAN’THAVEMYCHILDLEAVEME! I’MSOLONELY! *pant pant* I REFUSE TO LET MY LITTLE BABY HAVE SEX! HE’S SIMPLY NOT READY FOR THAT! Plus I do not want to be left all alone with an empty nest!
6. I must destroy this man’s sexuality so he can be my little boy again!

Basically your friend HAS to destroy your sexuality in response to you being sexual to ensure that you will still be her little boy. It’s her mothering instincts at work, and since you weren’t a real man for her, she has no choice but to assume you’re her little boy. If you were suddenly to be sexual with her, or anyone else, she would immediately feel as though you were growing up and thus you were leaving her.

END THEORY

So what can you take from this?

1. You really can’t blame women for doing what they do. You can only blame yourself for getting that sort of response. A mature man WILL NEVER get that sort of response from a woman, and if he does, he quickly dismisses the woman and does not give her the chance to make him into a little baby. A mature man respects women so much, that he will ONLY give his friendship to those women willing to respect his sexuality, and thus his whole being. It is only a beta-supplicating male that needs more and more mothers to take care of him.

2. Your female friends will kill your game. Unless you’re having sex with them or they’re getting you laid, they will not allow you to become a sexual being. For them, that’s like you growing up, and they’re so afraid of being abandoned that they will sabotage you to ensure you stay with them.

3. So be a mature man, embrace your sexuality, and don’t let ANYONE deny your existence as a sexual being. Because simply put…there’s just not enough mature men in the world right now to really satisfy women in the way they need. So step up to the plate, and be a man instead of a boy. You only hurt women by trying to be a child and bring out loving sexual feelings from them. A real man fixes women by being that man they need oh-so desperately to sex up hardcore.


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Cliff’s List is a place for men to become more successful. Where you can connect with other men in your community, around the world. Get advice from the world’s experts on seduction, dating and relationships.

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