Many teachers and coaches in the area of dating, self growth, and spirituality speak about the concept of destroying your ego, in order to “not give a fuck”.
For some reason, the idea of not caring has been glamorized in our society.
Also, to make that pitch even better, your ego can apparently be destroyed in a 2 day weekend, says the shiny advertising.
Why on earth would we choose to go against, become enemies with, and even think of destroying something which is an innate part of us?
Your ego houses your identity to a large degree, and as humans with a hugely logical and impressive brain, we don’t have a choice. So please give up, it will take the weight off. Stop taking this and yourself so God damn seriously.
If you run through life on autopilot, refusing to self reflect and look inward at times, then yes, your ego will control you, and determine your decisions in life to the point where you sit back in your office cubicle after an 80 hour week and ask yourself “Wow, where have the last 20 years gone,” while you massage your carpal tunnel syndrome which has been caused by all the typing you must do for your boss in order to make him a millionaire.
This is bad in terms of living the life you truly desire. With some simple awareness of how your ego influences you, you can begin to interact with it positively, to your advantage, with LIFE CHANGING results!
Monks sit in temples for decades trying to destroy their ego, i.e. – reach a state of no-ego, most of the time incredibly unsuccessfully. Sure, the monk may feel completely comfortable on his mountain in Tibet, but try throwing him into a nightclub and saying “Ok monk, go chat up that hot girl”…oh…look at that…his ego has magically returned in the form of fear.
The comfort zone can be a sneaky and manipulative little guy.
Unless you are willing to swallow 14 grams of Magic Mushrooms in one, or partake in an ayahuasca ceremony, which will only destroy your ego for a few hours, then please, gentlemen, stop making war upon yourself and pissing against the wind.
Instead, choose to become friends with your ego. Consciously mold it in a way which benefits you and guides you towards what you desire in life. Be your own biggest fan.
Fine tune your ego, losing what doesn’t serve you, and adding what creates success. It’s your friend.
Many of the men that I see for personal training arrive to me very broken and financially drained from these companies and individuals who offer to destroy your ego, making unrealistic, unfair, and very selfish promises. In this case, the “teacher” is moving down the road of an ego-maniac = the doctor is sicker than the patient.
The reason you may find the idea of destroying your ego so attractive, is because when we feel unrealistic fear, it is our ego that creates it as part of an internal struggle if you will.
I am here to tell you that you will never EVER eradicate the feeling/emotion of fear completely from your life. So just accept that now. Once you do, it makes taking risks, and manifesting the life you want so much easier, and faster.
Accept, at times, that there will be things that scare me. Situations and decisions that lead me to feel fear. It is AWESOME!
Yeah…fear is AWESOME! I said it! Deal with it!
It is your greatest pointing device towards growth. The reason you feel fear is because it is something you have not done before. Once you do it, the fear gradually or quickly begins to diminish the more you do it. It’s simple. Just accept it, and go through the process.
“I Just Don’t Give A Fuck”
I can guarantee this profound phrase has been dished out to you by a friend trying to make you feel better about something, or maybe you have given this advice to a friend…better yet, you might have even stated it proudly in your own head after a tough emotional situation where you felt broken:
“That’s it, from now on, I’m just going to stop giving a fuck. Fuck it.”
This is giving up! Which is not your fault. It’s coming from something very tiny, a lack of understanding. That’s all. Let us fix that, right now…
It is said that once you stop giving a fuck, you will be happy. You will feel free, and will never have another issue ever again.
I personally believe that the notion of not caring about anything is very misleading.
The issue is not about caring itself, but instead the things you are choosing to care about. These are usually the little things which ruin people’s daily existence. Such as what Bob thinks about how you are dressed, or what that woman may say if you tell her she is pretty, or what all your friends will think if you choose to do something confident when they all find it strange.
When I advise men to stop giving a fuck, I mean to stop giving a fuck about the mediocre parts of life which are holding you back, and START giving a fuck about the important things, such as being the very best and happiest version of yourself you can be.
I don’t give a fuck about engaging in pointless fake conversation.
I GIVE A FUCK ABOUT BEING AUTHENTICALLY HONEST IN WHO I AM WITH THE PEOPLE I MEET.
I don’t give a fuck about what others think about me based on my actions and behaviour.
I GIVE A HUGE FUCK ABOUT STAYING TRUE TO MY PURPOSE WHILST HELPING, AND SERVING, OTHERS, SETTING THEM FREE WITH MY HONEST PRESENCE AND PASSIONATE CHARISMA.
I don’t give a fuck if I approach that cute girl in the grocery section and she rejects me or tells me to fuck off.
BUT I GIVE A HUGE MOTHERFUCKING FUCK ABOUT ACTIVELY FINDING WOMEN/ PEOPLE/ INDIVIDUALS WHO RESONATE WITH WHO I AM.
I UNDERSTAND I MUST PUT MYSELF OUT THERE TO CREATE MY OWN AMAZING LIFE. SO THE RISK IS ALWAYS WORTH IT. I GIVE A HUGE FUCK ABOUT THAT!
Basically, stop giving a fuck about the stuff that does not benefit you in any way, and START giving a fuck about what truly matters to you in life.
If you don’t know what that may be yet, start there. Let that be your intention.
Get a piece of paper and write down the things you DO give a fuck about, not the stupid shit that causes you pain, or that you feel you must do because others have told you so. They are all part of the herd, repeating the same shit.
Step outside the box and begin to define yourself as an individual man. Build on that!
Trust me, when you start applying this your daily life, and the world around you, you will begin to change. You will begin to soar, be happy, generate passion, and rise to your best self, whilst simultaneously inspiring others to follow your positive strength.
The above is so incredibly attractive to a woman, I cannot do it any justice by verbalizing the effect.
You become solid. Grounded. Polarizing.
You can only succeed!